Thursday, June 15, 2006
Britney..Oh, This Should Be Good
Note: I have not been able to post photos on eBlogger for a couple of days. Effin' eBlogger sucks the big one. So, I will not be posting with photos for the next posts.. I didn't want to post this week until the problem is fixed, however I have a renter this week and that is not fair to her. So, do what Barney sings 'Just Imagine! Just Imagine!'Yes, I like these one on one celebrity trash interviews. I like to see them bob and weave out of 'certain questions' and then smile, and then cry, and then I like to see the so called journalist really feel like they are making a difference by their hard hitting questions. It's entertainment folks, plan and simple! And I gobble it up like a fat lady at a pie eating contest in Mayfair USA.
Here is how I think it will go:
Matt: "So, Britney, what's going on with the all these allegations of you being a bad Mommy?"
Britney: smack, smack..(gum chewing) Starts to Tear Up. "Well, Matt, it just hurts, is all, Ya' know? Hurts. It's like, I'm just trying to be a good Mommy, and everyone trips now and then with their baby. Ya know? Just ask the other mommies, it like, happens!!"
Matt: "But, to be fair, that was after you had three Pina Coladas at the Ivy."
Britney: "Ya see? This is what I'm sayin! Can't I have some drinks in private? And that's why I fired my nanny's Brazilian ass and got a GUY white nanny. He like, is so fit and can keep up with me! And IF Preston should fall, well I just KNOW he will be caught by my Man-Nanny."
Matt: "What about driving without Preston buckled up in his seat?"
Britney: "Here's the thing Matt. There is a whooole lot of us in small towns that drive without their babies in car seat. (smack smack) Don't look at me that way! It's TRUE! We all just sit them on our laps cause we know we are just driving to the corner market to get some cigs and the chances are slim to none there would be any kind of accident."
Matt: "Well, again to be fair Britney, you were on the Pacific Coast Highway in Malibu, where there are dangerous curves and a lot of car accidents."
Britney "Who you sayin' has dangerous curves!! Why you big flirt (smack smack). I know your just missin' Katie and all, so I will let you get away with that comment! I'm sure Kev wouldn't mind none."
Matt: "Where is K-Fed right now?"
Britney: "He took Preston to Vegas, he's such a great Daddy!' My Momma is with him though, to keep him straight. She's probably whoring it up though, knowing her!"
Matt Thinks: Oh God, if I could just make it through this interview, without staring at her cleavage, I think I have a shot at ABC Nightly News. *******